The Offtopics at Oussou

The Offtopics are back to rock Oussou.  Two delicious sets of fonky originals so we advise you to take your chance to dance.

This is our second gig at Bar Oussou this year as they trial a new curatorial approach to music.  Naturally we want to see them do well so we’ll be trying extra hard to put some junk in our funk so you better take the chance to dance!

You don’t have to take our word for it. Just ask your friendly neighborhood Spidey-butt.

Screen Shot 2016-05-17 at 3.39.45 pm

Anyone can dance to The Offtopics so don’t be afraid to show us your moves.


Even these moves…

Or these ones…

Or even…


Of course if you can’t make it to Oussou this Friday then here’s a dance party you can have at home courtesy of the good students of the “Humor and Code” Class at the Parsons School of Design and Technology.  Enjoy!

Entry is free this Friday.  Can’t do any better than that!



The Offtopics are back to fonk The Catfish

In the worlds before this Friday… Primal chaos reigned. Heaven sought order.
But the Phoenix can fly only when its feathers are grown.
The four worlds formed again and yet again,
As endless aeons wheeled and passed… Hang on… enough Monkey business.


All is well fonksters because The Offtopics are playing again this Friday at your favourite craft beer and sandwich haunt on Gertrude Street.

the offtopics ay The Catfish 22 Apr

That’s right – we’ll brook no timewasting!  There’s so much to do.  There are two whole sets of funky songs to get through before the night is over.  It’ll also be our last gig before we start doing some extended studio time prepping for our first ever album.  We’re really excited about this as *cue drum roll* we’ll be working with Nick Herrera who has previously recorded bands such as Hiatus Kaiyote and some other bands who you’ve probably never heard of.

Anyway – it’ll definitely be worth joining the conga line at the gig this Friday as we’ll be kicking out all sorts of jams.

There’s also a facebook event if that sort of thing floats your floating thing.



The Offtopics to play the LuWow’s Christmas revue with The Rebelles, Frosty the Snow Bastard and much much more on Saturday 19th December


If this is the Silly Season then you need Melbourne’s silliest band of bravos to usher it in.

Saturday 19th December sees The Offtopics team up with those mighty maidens of shimmy – The Rebelles – to wail on the whole Christmas thang.  There’ll be cocktails, dancing and Frosty the Snow Bastard’s Hissy Chrissy Karaoke all at Fitzroy’s finest Tiki Bar/cave of the Lava Goddess The LuWow.

Tickets $10 on the door.

Facebook event:

Don’t know much about The Rebelles and their shimmy shammy whammy?  Check them out here:

The Offtopics own the stage – so pay yer dues!

For those who missed the California Honeydrops show at The Northcote Social Club on the 26th of November – here’s what The Music’s Brad Summer had to say about it.

The Offtopics’ humble efforts get a mention too…



The Offtopics to support The California Honeydrops, November 26th at the Northcote Social Club


A long time ago… when the guys all had thick, lustrous hair…

The Offtopics were in their fusty mancave praying to a tiny terracotta idol of Jo Jo Zep for support when the statue spoke in a low musty dusty tone:

“Are you listening closely, boys?”

“Yes, Uncle Joe”, breathed The Offtopics.

Satisfied, the clay idol went on – with just the hint of a Maltese accent.

“You shall have the support you desire.  Henceforth your spirit animal is…” The little clay man paused for effect.

“What is it, Uncle Joe?!” The Offtopics asked breathlessly.

“Your spirit animal is THE HONEYDRIPPER!”

“Uh… what?” said The Offtopics but the little earthenware man spoke no more…

That was the beginning of the first great schism in The Offtopics.  Dan and Linc thought it referred to this 1978 number by The Falcons:

“But how can a song be a spirit animal?” wondered Mark, who thought it was more likely that a honeydripper is someone who empties drop toilets.

Anyway it all made sense when it was announced that The California Honeydrops were coming to town and they’ve asked The Offtopics to be their support at The Northcote Social Club on November 26th.

The California Honeydrops make just the kind of N’Orleans Fonk sound we like.  Check them out after you come see The Offtopics at the NSC.

For more information check out Tom Bowler tours:

The Offtopics get their Yah Yah’s out on Saturday 19 September

The Offtopics and Red Eagle at Yah Yah's

The Offtopics and Red Eagle at Yah Yah’s

Those clown princes of fonk, The Offtopics, are co-headlining an epic night of sizzling soul and swampy blues at Yah Yah’s on Saturday 19th September.  The night starts at 8pm with a trio of soul from That Gold Street Sound and Funk Rabbit with The Offtopics at 9pm in a trend-bucking early headliner.  Red Eagle are launching their forthcoming vinyl extravaganza that evening so after a solid dose of funkiness get ready for some deep water Warnambool blues.  They’ll be supported by Crossfire Hurricane.

This line-up is all killer and no filler so think about getting in when the doors open at 7pm.  There are good odds that this show is going to sell out!

For more info and updates check out:

or get in touch at

The Offtopics Go Swimming with The Catfish.

Some call him...

Some call him… “Tim”.

Saturday 8th August will see The Offtopics tickling The Catfish’s whiskers. The band’s sultry northern horns, slinky guitar and ever so cuddly grooves will be the perfect compliment to The Catfish’s craft approach to high-end carbs on tap.

Two funkified sets, craft beer and Philly Cheese Steak on Gertrude Street. Sounds like a recipe for boom-chacka-lakka-boom-boom shimmy shimmy boom!

The Offtopics play from 9pm. Entry is free. Contact for more information. goes Live!

Musicians famously bide their time, hone their act and polish their material in their bedrooms. In The Offtopics’ case the bedroom has been greater Brunswick as they’ve discreetly established their funny, funky sound in low-key venues such as Bar Oussou, The Brunswick Bowls Club and the Moreland City Band Hall. To give birth to something special you have to be thorough which is why the band went through a nine-month gestation period in the Brunswick Mechanics’ Institute front bar.

The time has finally come to leave the warm, womb-like embrace of that figurative bedroom and squint red-faced at the world bellowing “We Are Here! We ARE HERE!!”

These days that means getting together some demos as well as some decent photos for your website and social media. Cutting a demo was easy. With gigging experience going back to the 80’s the band had the nouse, the chops and the networks to whip up recordings early on capturing all the slink and the kink of their signature sound without leaving the guitarist’s lounge room.

Images were harder. The Offtopics knew it would take all the skills and experience of an artist who has photographed stars like Bono, Bob Geldof, Gotye and Kimbra to make them look good. The boys had some luck and managed catch the highly accomplished Emma Phillips in a moment of weakness. Emma gazed undeterred at this motley band of misfits with their combined age of 316 (and a combined weight of half a metric tonne). With a cavalier flick of her SLR she created the “Holiday in Vegas” series of headshots you see on the band’s ‘About’ page.

So HEAR The Offtopics and SEE them as well online at and BOOK them for your next event.